My BF told his friends he didn’t want me to have his baby because I was getting too fat

Fighting for Safety and the Birth of Lily

My blood pressure was dangerously high. The nurse gave me a teddy bear to squeeze during the ultrasound. This made me feel like a child, but it helped. I contacted a lawyer to understand my options regarding Josh and custody. The legal advice was complicated and expensive. The retainer alone was more than my monthly rent.

I reached out to a women’s resource center that offered free legal guidance for expectant mothers. They were incredibly helpful with paperwork. The woman who helped me had been through something similar and gave me her personal number.

When I checked my phone, I had 37 missed calls and dozens of texts from Josh. Reading his messages showed he was more concerned about himself than me or our baby. I blocked his number, needing space to think clearly. His messages were all about how I was ruining his life. Not a single one asked if the baby was okay.

Susie suggested I should inform our mutual friends about what happened, but I was afraid they wouldn’t believe me over Josh. I decided to write everything down with Richard’s testimony as proof. I shared it only with those I truly trusted. Most of them were shocked but supportive.

A couple people blamed my pregnancy hormones. This told me exactly who wasn’t really my friend.

After a week at Suz’s, I returned to our apartment with two friends to collect more of my belongings. I discovered Josh had changed the locks. I had to call a locksmith and show my lease agreement to prove I lived there. It cost me $200 I couldn’t afford.

Inside, I found Josh had trashed many of my personal items, including nursery supplies I bought. The damage made me more determined to get everything I needed. He’d even torn pages from my pregnancy journal where I documented all the little milestones.

He’d even cut up the baby clothes I bought. I saw pieces of the onesie my mom had sent from across the country in the trash. We quickly packed my car with as much as possible, including important documents.

I filed for a restraining order after documenting the property damage. The judge only granted a temporary order. He said there wasn’t enough evidence of physical danger. I installed security apps on my phone to record any future interactions. I felt like no one was taking this seriously.

With Suz’s help, I found a small one-bedroom apartment I could afford on my savings. The landlord seemed hesitant to rent to a pregnant woman with no current job. My parents had to co-sign the lease despite our strained relationship.

Mom kept saying, “I told you so about Josh”. She’d never liked him. This annoyed me at the time, but it turned out she had better instincts than I did.

Moving day should have been a fresh start. But I spotted Josh’s car parked down the street watching me. My brother KB and his friends formed a protective circle around me while we unloaded. Josh didn’t approach, but took pictures of us.

That night, Josh sent emails from new addresses. He alternated between apologies and accusations, but I refused to respond to any of them. He escalated to creating fake social media accounts to contact me. One message threatened to take the baby when it was born.

I reported the harassment to the police. The officer dismissed it as just a domestic dispute between parents to be. I started documenting everything meticulously, creating a paper trail they couldn’t ignore. The officer actually yawned while taking my report.

At my 32-E appointment, I spotted Josh in the hospital parking lot. My doctor took my concerns seriously. The hospital assigned me a special check-in procedure and escorted me to my car afterward. I felt like a prisoner in my own life.

Josh’s mother, Marlo, called, claiming she wanted to help mediate. She actually tried to convince me I was being cruel keeping a father from his child. I recorded the conversation and added it to my growing evidence file. She called me horrible names when I refused to meet with Josh.

I attended a support group for single mothers, but felt overwhelmed hearing about the struggles ahead. A group member named Award offered to mentor me. Having been through a similar situation 5 years earlier, she became a lifeline for practical advice.

Award helped me draft a birth plan that excluded Josh. The hospital required both parents information. I had to provide documentation of the restraining order and work with a patient advocate to ensure my safety. The bureaucracy was exhausting.

I found flowers on my doorstep with no card. My doorbell camera showed Josh delivering them at 3:00 a.m. I reported the restraining order violation, only to be told it was a harmless gesture. The officer even suggested I should appreciate the romance. I wanted to scream.

My car’s tires were slashed in my apartment parking lot. There were no security cameras to prove who did it. I had to spend money I couldn’t afford on repairs and a steering wheel lock. I was now taking Ubers to doctor appointments

. The drivers always wanted to chat about my pregnancy. Asking innocent questions like, “Is your husband excited?” made me want to cry.

Susie suggested I stay with her again until the baby came, but I refused to be driven from my new home. I asked KB to stay with me temporarily. I turned my living room into his bedroom. He snored loudly, but I felt safer with him there.

As my due date approached, my anxiety worsened with every strange noise. KB taught me self-defense techniques adapted for my pregnant state. I began to feel less helpless, though still constantly vigilant. I jumped at every sound outside my door. Every time the floorboards creaked, I’d break into a cold sweat.

At 36 weeks, I woke to someone trying to open my apartment door at midnight. The new Deadbolt KB had installed held firm. I called 911 while my brother confronted Josh through the door. Josh was yelling that he just wanted to see his baby. The police finally arrived and found Josh clearly intoxicated. But they still seemed reluctant to arrest him.

KB filmed the entire interaction while I reminded the officers about my restraining order. One officer knew Josh from high school, which made me nervous. Josh was arrested for violating the restraining order, but was released on bail the next morning.

I filed for an emergency hearing to extend and strengthen the protection order. I felt like I was fighting the system alone.

At the hearing, Josh appeared with an expensive lawyer who painted him as a concerned father to be. But Richard testified about Josh’s true comments at work. The judge extended the restraining order and added stricter provisions. Josh glared at me throughout the hearing.

Josh lost his job after Richard’s testimony revealed his character. This left him with nothing to lose. His harassment intensified, now including calls to my workplace claiming I was unstable. He told my co-workers I had threatened to hurt myself and the baby.

My boss, George, was initially understanding about the situation. But the constant disruptions began affecting business. I was placed on early maternity leave, cutting my income when I needed it most. I had to apply for emergency assistance to cover rent.

I discovered Josh had been spreading lies in our friend circle. He claimed I had cheated and the baby wasn’t his. Several friends saw through his lies. They created a rotation schedule to check on me daily. I was grateful, but felt like a burden.

One night, I received a text from an unknown number with pictures of me inside my apartment. I couldn’t figure out how they were taken. KB and I searched the entire place. Eventually, we found a hidden camera in the smoke detector. It had been recording for weeks.

The police were called about the hidden camera, but they said they couldn’t prove Josh installed it.

I contacted a private security company to sweep my entire apartment. I felt violated knowing he’d been watching me. The security company found two more cameras and evidence my computer had been hacked. The cost of their services depleted my savings. I had to start a crowdfunding campaign to help with expenses.

People online were surprisingly generous. The campaign gained attention online, bringing support from strangers. Josh discovered it and left threatening comments. My friends documented everything and reported him for further restraining order violations.

One comment said he’d get me eventually. Josh was arrested again for the violations, but managed to post bail quickly. I realized the legal system wasn’t going to truly protect me before the baby arrived. I felt completely helpless against his determination.

In desperation, I contacted Josh’s parents, hoping they might control their son. But they defended him, saying I was ruining his life. His father actually threatened to sue me for alienation of affection. I decided I needed to take more drastic measures for my safety.

I considered moving to another state to escape. I learned I couldn’t legally take my baby across state lines without court approval. I needed to find another solution that wouldn’t jeopardize my parental rights. Every option seemed to have impossible complications.

After consulting with Award and other survivors, I made a difficult decision. I worried about potential consequences. I invited Josh to meet me in a public cafe, planning to secretly record our conversation to get solid evidence. KB thought I was crazy, but understood my plan.

I arrived at the cafe early, setting up my phone to record and choosing a table near security cameras. My hands were shaking with anxiety. I texted KB, who was positioned nearby, ready to intervene if needed. I ordered tea, but couldn’t drink it.

Josh arrived looking surprisingly put together. He immediately began a charm offensive. I steered the conversation toward his behavior. He gradually dropped the act, growing irritated when I wouldn’t be manipulated. He kept trying to touch my hand. I calmly asked why he’d been harassing me, but his response was chilling.

“You took my baby and ruined my reputation, so I’m taking your peace of mind”. I realized he viewed this as revenge, not about our child at all. His eyes were cold as he said this.

I pushed further, asking about the cameras in my apartment. He smirked, asking how I enjoyed the show. I had explicit confirmation of his actions, which I knew would hold up in court. He seemed proud of how he terrorized me.

When I mentioned his comments about my body to co-workers, his facade completely dropped. I wasn’t prepared for his vicious verbal assault that followed. Other cafe patrons began staring as he called me disgusting names. A woman at the next table looked horrified.

The cafe manager, Karma, approached asking if everything was okay. Josh grabbed my wrist painfully under the table. I loudly announced I was 7 months pregnant and being threatened. Several people stood up immediately. Josh immediately switched tactics, claiming I was having a mental breakdown.

Multiple witnesses had heard his tirade. Karma asked him to leave while a customer who happened to be a nurse checked on me. The nurse gave me water and helped me breathe. Josh refused to leave, causing a scene. This only created more witnesses.

KB finally stepped in along with two other customers physically escorting Josh outside. One man told Josh he should be ashamed of himself.

I was shaken but triumphant having gotten solid evidence. As I left the cafe, I saw Josh vandalizing my car. KB called the police while I filmed from a safe distance. Josh was slashing my tires and breaking windows.

The police arrived quickly this time and arrested Josh on the spot. I started experiencing contractions from the stress. The nurse from the cafe helped me breathe while waiting for an ambulance. She held my hand the entire time.

At the hospital, doctors confirmed I was having false labor. They advised complete bed rest to prevent early delivery. I had to rely entirely on friends for the next few weeks. KB moved his PlayStation into my bedroom to keep me company.

Josh remained in jail, unable to make bail this time. His parents hired an aggressive attorney. I had to use my recording and witness statements to fight back in court. Their attorney tried to claim I had entrapped Josh. The judge reviewed all evidence and denied Josh bail. But the stress of court appearances was affecting my health.

My doctor wrote a letter allowing me to appear virtually for future hearings. My blood pressure was dangerously high again. With Josh temporarily contained, I finally had space to prepare for my baby. But I was emotionally exhausted and scared.

Susie organized a small private baby shower to lift my spirits. The gifts were thoughtful and practical. The baby shower was a welcome distraction. A gift arrived from Josh’s mother with a disturbing note. We contacted my lawyer, who filed for a restraining order against her as well. The note said, “I’ll be there for the birth whether you want me or not”.

At 38 weeks, my water broke in the middle of the night. I was alone when it happened. I had to call an ambulance while trying to remain calm. The dispatcher stayed on the phone until help arrived.

At the hospital, my contractions intensified quickly. The nurse couldn’t locate my special check-in status. I had a panic attack, terrified Josh would somehow find me. I couldn’t stop crying between contractions. My doctor finally arrived and confirmed my protection status. The labor was progressing faster than expected.

There wasn’t time for the epidural I had planned on. The pain was unbelievable, but I had no choice. KB and Susie arrived to support me. The hospital only allowed one person in the delivery room. They took turns, ensuring I was never alone. KB nearly fainted during his shift.

After 6 hours of excruciating labor, my beautiful daughter Lily was born. The joy was mixed with fear as I checked every hospital staff ID. The nurses created a code word system for anyone entering my room. They used sunflower as our safety word.

Holding Lily for the first time was magical. I couldn’t fully enjoy it knowing Josh might try something. The hospital assigned security to patrol near my room. I barely slept that first night, watching Lily constantly.

News of Lily’s birth somehow reached Josh’s mother, Marlo. Hospital security stopped her in the lobby. She created a scene demanding grandmother’s rights. She tried to claim she was my mother to get past security.

The hospital wanted to discharge us after two days, but I didn’t feel safe going home. Award helped me find a temporary safe house through a domestic violence organization. We left through a service entrance to avoid being seen. The safe house provided security and support. I had to remain completely off social media.

My friends spread misinformation about where we were staying to throw Josh off our trail. They posted about me staying at places I wasn’t.

Josh was released from jail pending trial. The prosecutor had added additional charges based on new evidence. His bail conditions now included GPS monitoring. He still managed to send letters through others.

I filed for sole custody of Lily, but Josh counterfiled, claiming parental rights. I had to prepare for a lengthy court battle while caring for a newborn. Lily had colic and barely slept, adding to my exhaustion. My maternity leave was running out. Returning to work meant finding child care I could trust.

I accepted my parents’ offer to help, slowly rebuilding our relationship. My mom fell in love with Lily instantly. The custody hearing was scheduled, but Josh’s attorney requested multiple delays. Months passed with the situation still unresolved. Every delay cost me more money I didn’t have.

Lily grew into a beautiful, happy 3-month-old. But I lived in constant fear whenever we left the safe house. I rarely ventured out except for necessary appointments. I missed fresh air and normal activities.

At one doctor’s appointment for Lily, I met Tim, a pediatric nurse who was incredibly kind. I was too traumatized to consider dating. We became friends instead. He offered advice about Lily’s development. He gave me his number just for baby questions.

After 4 months in the safe house, I found a new apartment in a secure building. It was in a different city away from my support network. Tim offered to help with the move since he lived nearby. He brought his truck and packed lunch for everyone. Moving day went smoothly with Tim’s help.

As we unloaded the last boxes, I had a panic attack imagining Josh finding us. Tim taught me grounding techniques he used with anxious patients. His calm presence made me feel safer.