What’s the best way to impress your girlfriend’s father?

The Secret Fluency and the Dinner Betrayal

My girlfriend’s childhood friend deliberately mistransated everything I said to her father. He told him I called Japanese food disgusting and his company a joke.

He was furious until I surprised everyone by telling him the truth in perfect Japanese. I destroyed his favorite employee with perfect Japanese.

Before my girlfriend, Ma first brought me to meet her father at his company in Japan, I was terrified. She had told me dozens of stories about how traditional he was.

One time, a foreign employee showed up to a meeting 5 minutes late, and her dad still calls him late Larry. 3 years later.

Another time, someone poured soy sauce directly on their rice at a company dinner. Her dad muttered, “Yaban Gene, barbarian,” under his breath.

The worst part, her dad was also going to be my boss. Mika promised he’d hire me at his trading company.

I was still scared because I was a purebred American. I knew it was a big dream of his for Mika to marry a Japanese businessman.

In the months leading up to meeting him, I spent 2 hours every day in a Japanese setting to learn the culture. I studied business hotels, office districts, even corporate drinking parties.

So, when the time came, I had practically formed a script in my head of how to act and speak. Mika, of course, didn’t know any of this.

I kept it a secret because I didn’t want her to think I was desperate. When the day came, I walked into the restaurant and bowed at exactly the right angle when introduced.

I waited for him to sit first and poured his beer immediately. I responded properly to everything.

I called him Shacho, and kept my mouth shut unless spoken to. I knew things were going well when his secretary kept refilling my tea.

She smiled about how polite I was. Her dad didn’t speak English, but it really seemed like he liked me, too.

He would nod every time I said, “Hi, yes,” at the right moments. He complained about young people these days, as if I wasn’t American.

Now, you’re probably wondering how I understood what he was saying. Well, I went behind Mika’s back.

While studying Japanese business culture, I started taking intensive Japanese lessons. I didn’t want to say anything about it because I wanted to surprise her at our wedding.

So, up until this point, it had been around 6 months of lessons. I could hear how well Mr. Tanaka was speaking of me to his secretary.

Mika was practically glowing with pride. I had no idea that it was the calm before the storm.

There was just one person who made it abundantly clear that I was an unwanted guest. That was Hero, Mika’s childhood friend who worked at the company.

He constantly made snide remarks in English about how I was taking advantage of the boss’s daughter. He made jokes about how I was probably just here for a visa.

I was convinced that I would win him over eventually and just shrugged it off. But the next time I was there for a big client dinner, things had completely changed.

When me and Mika showed up at the private room, her dad barely acknowledged me. He asked Mika, “Why is the foreigner here for important business?”

Mika looked just as confused as me, but just rolled her eyes before we sat down. The clients arrived and Mr. Tanaka served everyone premium sushi and Wagyu beef.

Meanwhile, he pointed me to a plate of natto mixed with raw squid and fermented fish guts. There was so much that the smell made everyone shift away from me.

Just before I could ask for rice to mix it with, Mr. Tanaka turned to Mika. He said, “Kore waitsumo kenji no Ichibiansuki data.”

This was always Kenji’s favorite. That’s when everything made sense.

Kenji was her Japanese ex from university and he worked at Mitsubishi. Her father hadn’t accepted me.

So there I was pretending to eat fermented fish guts. Hero turned to my future boss and the clients and said in Japanese, “America, no.”

“The American just told me Japanese business culture is outdated.” I froze.

My girlfriend opened her mouth to speak, but I lightly touched her wrist under the table. I had to test the waters.

“This dinner is really wonderful,” I said in English with a completely straight face. “Kanihon Shoku gamazuk McDonald’s.”

“He says Japanese food is disgusting and he wants McDonald’s.” Hero translated.

Mr. Tanaka’s face went red and he started apologizing to the clients. The room was silent.

I couldn’t even hide my smile. “Thank you for including me in this important meeting.”

I said no. He said your company is a joke and Americans do everything better.

Hero lied. That’s when I looked directly at Mr. Tanaka and said in perfect business, “Shacho, I’ve been studying Japanese for 6 months.”

“I want to marry your daughter. Everything Hero translated was a lie.”

My girlfriend nearly spit out her wine. Even the secretary gasped and covered her mouth.

The client sat back down, fascinated. Hero tried to recover, stammering excuses, but it was over.

I had won and I didn’t know it at the time, but Hero was still plotting revenge through his connections. It wasn’t long before he turned my entire life upside down.