My wife demanded we open our marriage, but is now demanding we close it.

Consequences and Finality

It turns out that after my wife resigned, this friend and the manager began a fling of their own. Apparently, she had a pregnancy scare, which caused him to basically turn into Dr. Hyde and Mr. Jackal.

To make matters worse, she had a boyfriend whom she apparently could see a future with him. The only reason why she even had a fling was because she was curious of the experience.

Her boyfriend found out because he discovered an email between the two discussing the potential pregnancy. But the manager basically accused her of baby trapping him.

Of course, he left her. The reason why she made contact is because she was under the impression that my wife managed to save our marriage and was desperately seeking advice.

I just turned and left and have been staying in the apartment ever since. Update three: Turns out the former friend who had the pregnancy scare with the manager was indeed pregnant.

However, the stress of losing her boyfriend and being humiliated by the affair caused her to lose the baby. She basically turned ballistic and went full scorched earth on the manager.

She exposed him to all upper management and his fiance, who left him. The former friend actually got in contact with me.

She wanted my side of the story because she was collecting evidence against him, but she wanted to do it in person, and I agreed. From the moment I saw her face, I knew she was broken.

The dark circles under her eyes and her red colored iris clearly showed she didn’t get any sleep and was haunted by her own thoughts. She thanked me for agreeing to meet her and immediately apologized for her role in my wife’s adventure.

It turns out her and my wife spoke again, and that’s when she learned I had moved out. She didn’t shift the blame and wanted to take responsibility, hence why she wanted to meet in person.

I thanked her for her efforts but asked her why she would go this far. She said losing both a child and the love of her life changed who she was at the core.

She said she can hardly look in the mirror without feeling disgust. She can hardly sleep because all she sees is her ex’s face the day he found out.

This woman clearly hated herself, and this meeting might have been a form of punishment for her. She tells me since fraternizing among co-workers is a breach of conduct, and more so because he was in a position of influence, he will most likely be fired and possibly blacklisted from that field as a whole.

But the same may be true for her as well, and she has accepted it. She left after getting my side of the story and apologized again.

I needed to get a few things from the old place, so I picked a time when I thought my wife wasn’t home. Unfortunately, she was there.

What surprised me is that she had most of our wedding photos out on the coffee table as well as others, and she was staring at them. When she noticed me, I could see she was crying.

She tried to hug me, but I gently pushed her aside. She tried to offer me lunch, but I told her I wasn’t hungry and that I wouldn’t be long.

I just needed a few things before I could proceed. She said she had something to show me.

She pulled out her phone and showed me a message she received two days ago from her former manager, who berated her. It was from a new number since she blocked his old one.

Apparently, my wife helped her former friend expose him to all relevant parties, and he was fuming. She thought by exposing the secret she was removing its power as well as giving us a fighting chance.

I told her I was glad that she had the courage to do that, but it doesn’t change anything between us. I also informed her that I will be stopping marriage counseling but will do individual counseling instead.

This made her sob softly, and she said she understood. I know I am supposed to feel either elation of the actions taken or rage because it took this long, but I feel numb towards her.

This isn’t normal, hence why I want to address it in individual counseling and not marriage counseling. I have also seen a divorce lawyer at my brother’s recommendation just to be safe.

As of now, I am not really willing to fight for this marriage, and it seems my wife can sense it. Before I left, she tried to initiate intimacy.

When I refused, she yelled and asked what Charlotte does for me that she can’t. She said this in a voice so loud I am sure the neighbors heard.

I shook my head and told her if she still couldn’t tell after all that’s happened, then it’s clear where our marriage is headed.